The Wellness Spotlight series highlights military spouses and their real-world health and wellness journeys in a Facebook live series. Below is an excerpt of Lauren’s feature.
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“Wellness is not only fitness, it’s also doing work you enjoy, finding balance with your family and finding balance in your day.”
WHAT WAS YOUR LOWEST MOMENT, WHEN YOUR HEALTH SUFFERED THE MOST?
Life as a military spouse is certainly a roller coaster. I wouldn’t say I have a lowest moment, but I certainly can think of times that were hard. My husband left for his first deployment, a fifteen-month one, when our daughter was six weeks old. There was another deployment when I had three kids under three. It feel a little bit like drowning sometimes. It is easy to feel very isolated during those times and that is why the support system you build is so important. I think it is important to treat everything as a season. While this certainly isn’t a lowest moment, I think something I have struggled with more recently is our move to Europe and working for MILLIE. After a very long, well-though-out process, I decided I needed to change my role and take a step back in my current job to better support my family.
WHAT WAS YOUR HIGHEST MOMENT, WHEN YOU FELT YOUR HEALTHIEST?
My highest moments are when I really find my structure and flow in daily life. Some of these times comes within deployments as well. You have an opportunity to focus on goals you want accomplish. Taking lemons and turning them into lemonade means seeing where you can shift your focus during certain periods of time. If my husband is deployed that gives me one less person to consider in my day-in and day-out routine. It is actually easier to plan a structured daily routine when my biggest wildcard is out of the mix. Though, I certainly strive to find this kind of balance when he is home as well.
WHAT IS ONE PERSONAL HABIT THAT CONTRIBUTES TO YOUR SUCCESS?
One of my favorite things to do is sit down every morning and do two things. First, I assign purpose to the time in my day from 6-9 pm. Some of that time might be free time to hang out with my kids or peruse Instagram, but similar to budgeting your money to zero, when you budget your time to zero it allows you to assign time to do fun things without feeling guilty about it. It also serves as a reminder for me to stay focused during work sprints. Similar to H.I.I.T. (High Intensity Interval Training) workouts, you get super focused and do work for a short period of time. Once the time is up, you step away. The second thing I do is write out my to-dos for the day under both work and family. I establish which items are the three targets that I absolutely must finish. If those get accomplished I can feel good about the day. The to-do list is never-ending so if I look for a sense of accomplishment from finishing my list it will never happen. These two habits are essential for my mental wellness.
IS MENTORING IMPORTANT? HOW DO YOU FIND A MENTOR?
Mentoring is very important because whether you are the mentor or the mentee, you both can learn something from the other person. If you want to find a mentor, you should reach out to someone you look up to. You might not get them, but you never know. People enjoy mentoring and if they have the time they might say “yes”. If it is not the right fit, don’t be afraid to reach out to someone else.
What RESOURCES do you recommend?
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Bodyweight exercises: Sweat by Kayla Itsines App
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Mental Health: Headspace App.
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Kitchen Gadget: The Instant Pot
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Cookbook & Recipe Website: Nom Nom Paleo
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“At times our diet could be described as “survival” and I don’t mean like an ode to the “caveman” diet. I mean it is hard when you have kids in all different directions. Dinner time has to be planned in advance or you will find yourself in a scramble to get something together.”
IF YOU COULD RECOMMEND ONE BOOK TO MILITARY SPOUSES, WHAT WOULD IT BE AND WHY?
Brené Brown– Well, I have to second Erica’s recommendation from last episode about Brene Brown. Her books are eye opening and fantastic. If you need a short cut she has several TED talks.
Tim Ferriss– 4 Hour Work Week was very eye opening for me a decade ago. While it sounds like a business book it really is much more. It is a huge shift in the way you see the world. Another Tim Ferris book is “Tools of Titans.” It is more of a reference guide, but I think you can learn so much from other people. This book makes it easy to flip through and read about the habits of others.
The Best Self Journal- This helps implement some of the time management and productivity habits mentioned.
(Purchases using the link above will help InDependent cover administrative costs for our programs at no extra cost to you!)
ABOUT LAUREN ROTHLISBERGER
Lauren Rothlisberger is the director of marketing at Millie, a company who wants to “bring military families home” and support your move from start to finish. Lauren currently lives in Germany with her husband and four children. She loves: her family, living abroad, design, development, marketing, small businesses, and the process of trying to make all of those things flow together.
